The most amazing leaders understand that they don’t know everything. They are comfortable being open, transparent, getting out there and yes, being real. This leader appears as someone who is down to earth and yet still confident in who they are and what they provide to the group. Instead of hiding behind walls for fear of disgrace, they say quite openly, “I’m not sure what to do here – what do you think?” They feed their teams with honest, open and transparent dialog which helps solutions come from the greater whole. These individuals let go of being perfect. They don’t have to control everything and it is a beautiful thing to see in action.
Why Do Leaders Fear Not Being Perfect?
I HAVE to Know It All
No you don’t and no you shouldn’t. What you need to know are the right questions and you need to constantly be asking them. Pull the group together and be strong enough to put a problem on the table for the team to solve, even if you fear it will make you look bad. It actually gives you stature because you are pulling from the strengths and ideas of others. Once you devise a solution, get it implemented and you will be the star!
They Don’t Think I Know What I’m Doing
Get all of the facts before reacting. Find the different points of view and translate them to all interested parties. If there is an email or a side comment that makes you feel they are questioning the job you are doing, stop and lift yourself to an objective view. Ask what could be going on for them, for the project and for me. It is very likely that whatever is going on has nothing to do with you!
It’s My Way or No Way
People who don’t trust their team tend to want to tell them how to do everything. A good leader knows when to let go, knows also when to swoop back in to help guide a project. But they let their people decide how to execute. There are many ways to get things done. As long as the right parameters and inspiration are present the team can make it happen. You just have to give them some space to do it!
They Can’t Handle the Truth
If there is something that you are sensing, say it. Clarify with others to find out if your assumptions are correct. Say what isn’t being said but do it in a way that is kind and/or curious. If someone is doing something that is not in their best interest, it is a gift to them for you to let them know what you see. Telling someone a hard truth, if done in honor of them and with kindness, is the best thing you could do for their growth and success.
What If I Go Blank?
Many people (more than you know) fear that if they are speaking in front of a group, they will go completely blank and look like a fool. They don’t want to look weak or incompetent in front of anyone. If you go blank, pause, catch your breath… make a joke… ask a question… be human and tell them you just went blank. Trust me everyone will think better of you for it!
I am curious about other leaders out there – how have you learned to lead by not being perfect? What experiences have reinforced you to do so? What scares you from letting go of being perfect and what do you do to try and manage that fear? We would love to hear from you. Please post your comments below.